Found this one in the archive that I never published...
Over the weekend Finn had a major breakthrough during Tummy Time. On Friday whenever we did Tummy Time he would do his usual routine of smushing his face into the floor and crying the whole time, but on Saturday morning (after a particularly good night's sleep thanks in part to the swing, but more on that later) I was playing for him and heaving a sigh because it was time to put him on his tummy -- "play" that was feeling more and more like a chore for both of us -- and when I put him down, he just picked his head up and looked around smiling at me. I was amazed and thought it must just be a fluke, but we did lots of tummy time for the rest of the day and every time he kept his head up the entire time. Now he won't put it down! One of my friends, who has a baby 2 months older than Finn, said that for her baby, it was like something just clicked one day. I didn't really believe her. I thought it had to be a gradual process that babies worked up to, but clearly I was wrong. In just 12 hours Finn went from not being able or willing to pick his head up to only holding his head up high. In just the couple days that has passed since Saturday, Finn has also started reaching for things while on his tummy and trying very hard to roll over -- the fact that he can't quite yet is the only thing that now upsets him about tummy time!
As thrilled as I am that Finn has reached this huge milestone, I'm finding myself still feeling like a failure in the Mom department because of all the sleep struggles that we're having. And maybe its not as bad as I think, but the lack of sleep I'm experiencing has warped my perspective a bit. On a good night, he'll fall asleep at the breast sometime between 7 and 8 pm and Ben and I are able to transfer him into his bassinet without waking him and he'll stay asleep for 5 hours. After that first waking though, anything can happen. Sometimes he's awake every hour or two and needs help falling back asleep. Rarely he wakes up every couple hours and soothes himself back to sleep. Even more rarely he will sleep an additional 3-4 hours without waking.
Last night for example, he was awake at 8:30, I fed him and put him back to sleep in his bassinet. Then he was awake at 10:30, I fed him in bed because I was too tired to be vertical and at 11:30 attempted to put him back in his bassinet. He immediately woke up. I let him roll around for a while, hoping he would self soothe, but it escalated to crying so I picked him up and rocked him for a few minutes and he went right back to sleep. I attempted another transfer and he woke up again. I tried feeding him again and he nursed a little bit before falling asleep. I tried to put him in his bassinet again and he stayed asleep for a few minutes before waking crying. At this point is was 12:30 and I had to wake Ben. I needed a break for a few minutes. Ben rocked Finn back to sleep while I got myself a piece of toast and a cup of tea. Ben put him down and Finn awoke crying again. We went through the checklist of things that could be bothering him and tried to address them all. I ended up nursing him again at which point he filled his diaper and promptly went to sleep. That meant that I had to change him and when I did so, he woke up. I tried to nurse and rock him back to sleep, but he wouldn't have it and I was too worn out to go on much longer, so I put him in his bassinet and wheeled it out into the living room and brought his swing into our room and placed in next to the bed. I put him in it and turned it on and he was asleep withing 10 minutes. I turned the swing off and he slept without making a peep from 1:30 am to 6:30 am.
This is the second time we have resorted to using the swing for nighttime sleeping when all else has failed and each time he has slept amazingly well. Frustrated doesn't even begin to describe what I'm feeling.
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